5 Easy Ways to Win Your Private Money Partner’s Heart

Today I’d like to share with you how you can give the gift of romance to your private money lenders, which will in turn give you the gift of happy, long-term partnerships and maybe even a happy referral or two. Hang with me here and all will become clear – and keep reading for a special gift I’ve created just for you 🙂

Private Money and Dating

You may have heard me say before that private money = relationships. And it’s true. While many don’t love hearing it, the fact is we’re in a relationships business, no two ways about it. However most people tend to only think of this in terms of getting a “first date” with a private money partner (agreeing to fund that first deal) and fail to realize an obvious truth: Just like in the regular world, a first date is only a first date – it’s a only the start!

You can only ride those fluttery feelings of first date infatuation so far. From there you have to intentionally keep the romance alive – you have to keep them infatuated and interested in going out with you over and over again. I have a few specific ways I’ve been doing this over the years and have been teaching others to do the same with great results – a few simple, but very effective personal “touches” that really help keep the sparks flying and keep my private lenders thinking fondly of me.

Here are a few of them…

1. First Date Thank You Card – This is just a simple, handwritten message I like to send promptly after my first meeting with a potential private lender. Hand written notes are a dying art and really make an impact when not expected. This extra touch literally only take a couple of minutes and does wonders for letting them know you really value them personally.

2. Welcome Letter
– Once someone agrees to fund a first deal, I always send a short letter warmly welcoming them and reminding them that long term relationships are important to me, and that serving them well is my top priority. Major brownie points here 🙂

3. Before Closing Status Updates – No one likes being in the dark or bugging you for updates. So I take the opposite approach by proactively giving them written status updates on regular intervals leading up to closing. Staying in constant contact like this really reinforces your commitment to take great care of them.

4. Happy Anniversary Letter – That’s right, on the 1-year anniversary of your first deal together (and annually after that), you should send an anniversary letter to thank them for their business and the relationship you’re building together. No one expects this! I want them to know that I hope their first year with us has exceeded their expectations, that I’m in this for the long haul, and I eagerly welcome their input at any time. My aim is to create not just clients, but raving fans.

5. Year End Letter – This letter is a good chance to remind them of the year’s progress – interest earned, monthly payments made on time, and any other financials that can make them feel good and you look like a champ. Remind them how much money you’ve made them and how much you value your relationship.

Building Emotional Capital

The idea here is pretty simple: Give your private money partners little reminders that you value them, their business and that you’re interested in a long-term business relationship. Show them how much you care, and you’ll earn some major emotional capital. And the emotional capital you build with your private money lenders like this can be converted into actual capital in two very important ways:

1. More repeat deals with the same partners (You make them money and make them feel so good – why wouldn’t they want to keep dating you?)
2. Warm referrals to new private money partners (After all, who doesn’t like to brag a little about their best relationships?)

Bottom Line: When a private money partner agrees to fund a deal, they’re agreeing to nothing more than a first date. Quality, long-term relationships aren’t built overnight or without a little effort. And it’s worth the time and effort, but sadly most investor never even think of it. Use my “touches” above and whatever else you can think of to keep them interested in dating you for the long haul.

6 Responses to “5 Easy Ways to Win Your Private Money Partner’s Heart”

  1. Mary Stead Reply

    I appreciate these teachings and information so much. They really just make sense, but having someone who has walked the walk helps. Thank you again

    • Charity Akers-Greathouse Reply

      You’re welcome, Mary!

  2. Preston Vismale Reply

    In this case, would this person be considered a hard money lender? I have talked to a few and their ponts and interest ranged from 15-18% with points being about 4-6%.

    • Patrick Riddle Reply

      Yes, they would be considered a hard money lender. A private lender isn’t a “professional investor” (like a hard money lender)… it’s just an individual who wants to make a better return on their money.

      – Patrick

  3. Preston Vismale Reply

    I recently (what I thought was going to be my first deal, 3 unit building needing rehab) had a private lender at 10%, and very amenable to my of 6-month-to year payback. Initially he said he wanted $1370 for insurance & other bank related costs. I paid him, then he said he needed additional costs because I was a “nonasset based loan”. Found out later that he was actually “shopping my loan”. I foolishly thought he was funding loan from his own pocket. Anyway, this time around I going step-by-step from lessons here. Glad I have some better “heads” to talk to about this…!!!

    • Patrick Riddle Reply

      Hey Preston, with private lenders, you should never have to pay anything prior to actually closing on the property. That’s definitely a red flag. As you take action on these lessons, let us know how we can help.

      Also, check out this video on my 3-step private money getting process…

      – Patrick

Leave a Reply